jump to navigation

Mess July 15, 2010

Posted by icelikediamonds in Uncategorized.
trackback

3:21 pm. At the library.

Blog buddies? What is happening? It’s like drowning in a washing machine on the spin cycle. I feel so wasted. Not the kind of wasted that involves large quantities of alcohol, but the kind that comes from pouring your entire reserve of self into something, and knowing that the perfected end result is going to belong to someone else. Why? After these many months, I still can’t wrap my brain around it. And not only that, but I’m struggling with the realization that you he just doesn’t want to things to be fixed.

I’m tired of all this anger. I’m tired of all this lingering pain. Whomever said that all is fair in love and war should be shot with a .44 calibre love letter, straight through the heart (Yes, another lyrical reference. Eat me). I’m so tired of it. I’m caught in the storm and don’t give me Rihanna’s umbrella, I’d rather stab you in the face with it. I’m tired of talking about how I’m tired of talking about you. I’m not over it. I have to deal with that. I have to get over not being over yo– it.

I made you promise me to. . well forget that. I can’t keep track of all these broken promises littering the floor. It’s like walking on shards of glass with bare feet. How many times can you walk into a door that slams in your face? And who the hell keeps wanting to walk into that damned slamming door?!  That’s rhetorical. . we all know the ‘answer’ to that. We are suckers for punishment. Masochists. It’s a pity I never turn out to be the masochist I wish I was. This pain would hurt a whole lot less.

Why are we even talking? Our senses of humour are still a perfect match. Shut up. We both know where this could lead. . and most likely would if I allow it. Things could messy. .

Hands Clean

Alanis Morisette

If it weren’t for your maturity none of this would have happened
If you weren’t so wise beyond your years I would’ve been able to control myself
If it weren’t for my attention you wouldn’t have been successful and
If it weren’t for me you would never have amounted to very much

Ooh this could be messy
But you don’t seem to mind
Ooh don’t go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime

We’ll fast forward to a few years later
And no one knows except the both of us
And I have honored your request for silence
And you’ve washed your hands clean of this

You’re essentially an employee and I like you having to depend on me
You’re a kind of my protégé and one day you’ll say you learned all you know from me
I know you depend on me like a young thing would to a guardian
I know you sexualize me like a young thing would and I think I like it

Ooh this could get messy
But you don’t seem to mind
Ooh don’t go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime

We’ll fast forward to a few years later
And no one knows except the both of us
I’ve more than honored your request for silence
And you’ve washed your hands clean of this

What part of our history’s reinvented and under rug swept?
What part of your memory is selective and tends to forget?
What with this distance it seems so obvious?

Just make sure you don’t tell on me especially to members of your family
We best keep this to ourselves and not tell any members of our inner posse
I wish I could tell the world cause you’re such a pretty thing when you’re done up properly
I might want to marry you one day if you watch that weight and keep your firm body

Ooh this could be messy and
Ooh I don’t seem to mind
Ooh don’t go telling everybody
And overlook this supposed crime

Advertisements

Comments»

1. Mark - July 16, 2010

I actually really liked this post. Full of passion and great analogies. It may be cynical of me to have enjoyed reading it, but I actually feel inspired.

You know how I feel about this whole situation, so I won’t comment on it here. Just keep your head held high, you have done more this year than you have since VFS and I’m very proud of you. Chin up, kid.

2. Mark - July 16, 2010

Also, I analyzed the writing style of this post, welcome to the club:

I write like
Chuck Palahniuk

icelikediamonds - July 16, 2010

Thanks, Mark. I’m also glad to inspire, even if it at the cost of my totured soul, haha.

P.S Who is Chuck Palahniuk?

Mark - July 16, 2010

The guy who wrote Fight Club

icelikediamonds - July 17, 2010

Ah. . so that makes me awesome? xP


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: