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It Shouldn’t Take a Funeral April 25, 2010

Posted by icelikediamonds in Uncategorized.
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I dislike hospitals. Since my grandfather’s stroke last Saturday, I’ve been spending a lot of time in one. The progress he’s made in just seven days after a major stroke is remarkable. He’s not even droopy! I especially noticed a marked improvement in him today, mostly in his disposition. He seemed happier, more positive. Despite all this, frank discussion amongst my mum, my aunt, my great-aunt, and my cousin revealed that he (my grandfather) could have as little as six months to two years left to live. I’m not quite sure what to do with this information. It always seemed to me that he would be around forever. He is my only remaining grandparent.

My great-aunt is eighty-five years old now. Though visiting with her and my cousin today made me happy, it also gave cause for some grim thoughts. This is not surprising by any means. I am not an optimistic person. I’m also a bit macabre. I digress, I started thinking about how old everyone was getting, myself included. I wondered who would be left to witness the occasion of my wedding, should there ever, ever be one. Who will be around to be proud of me if I ever, ever make something of myself? And what if I ever, ever have kids?

It made me think about how short life is. I feel like I’ve wasted so much time already. Yet, life cannot be rushed. It will play out as it sees fit. Such a funny thing life is. . .  I just want to linger in the evening sun.

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